Work Shenanigans

Not really the one to rant about work and stuff as I'd rather deal with personal things in person (which explains the amount of fangirling posts on most of my social media accounts and of how as much of a social butterfly that I am, I only open up and talk regularly to a chosen few). But this recent development calls for some extra long scribbles.

If you'd tell me I'd design a superstructure with 40+ something bays, in graphical user interface (GUI) which i am not so familiar with out of practically scratch (by scratch i meant without templates and macros) months ago, I'd laugh at you. Really laugh because how is that even possible?? I've been used to macros and shortcuts and every fing program that'd make work easier so to speak which is not really bad, work efficiency-wise but... erm, you know. Sometimes we tend to overlook what's more important.

Not that I didn't learn that from my previous professional home because I'm grateful about everything: the experience, the learnings, the acquaintances and all. But recently it has dawned on me how meager my engineering knowledge has become and how little the engineering concepts that I can actually remember despite practicing in the design field for 2, 3 years. (Welcome to the kamote club, April! Or should i say I've always been a kamote eversince. lol at self-pity but at some point, unfortunately, I really am.)

I've been used to it to a point that it, sadly, probably, has become all that I knew. (I probably did not make sense, no? Heh anyway.)

That being said, when I decided that I wanted to go for the big change and actually went for it, I struggled big time. I'm disappointed with myself yet again. I began questioning if this is His plan for me (pursuing a career in the field that has practically rejected me in many ways) or is this what I just want but not really in line with His plans. Such dark days.

Then I pray and He gave me the light. And He's worked in me in ways that cannot be fully expressed in words. I am beyond amazed and grateful for all the help that He's sent (and still sending) along the way in all of its forms. I know this may sound cliché to some, but that's how it works, really. And that is how He works in my life.

Today, I am still struggling, still not the best, but getting better little by little. Things are never easy but I am happier. Of course, we'll mess up and it's okay. (I still get confused with anything technical most of the time haha.)

We'll be exposed to new things, new environment and location, new opportunities to grow and we get to l deal with new people (I'm dealing with foundation designs now, too oh my gosh hahaha) and it promises nothing but the best.

The future is dreadful, liberating and exciting at the same time. But the good thing is we'll never cease to find ways to learn and adapt. We just need to try harder and pray harder. We should never stop.