For the chapter that is about to end and the new stories that are about to unfold. For all the hardships and failures that serve as reminders of how much God trusts us that we may all overcome all of it. (So if it feels too much to handle, know that He believes in you THAT much.) For the adventures and life's sweet, little surprises. To the family, to the old friends, the keepers, the newest additions, the recurring characters, the ones I've let go, even the shitty ones that I chose to (stupidly but wholeheartedly) keep or those who might have hurt me... wherever in the group you might fit, I am grateful for you... for helping me be who I am now. 2016 has taught me to be adventurous, at the same time content and more appreciative of life. 

Life isn't all roses and butterflies, but we have sunrise and rainbows. And lastly and most importantly through all of it, we have Him. Who can be against us? Today as the year ends, I choose to be grateful. I choose to love and to be hopeful. 

It's time to turn the pages.

Cheers to 2017. I'm stoked for you. x

I am admittedly not a fashionista. I dress for comfort and I don't give a shit as to what others may think (though it took a while for me to be able to say that; to be comfortable in my own skin, to be totally honest). I'd wear a skirt or a floral and loud-coloured trousers when I feel like it despite, you know, my size (thick arms/legs, all big) and uneven complexion. I just do me. Casual and laidback. Never would have I ever thought of blogging about fashion but I was pretty happy with my recent purchases that I cannot help but share it.

So we had our Christmas party a few days back with the Black and White theme. Most of my dresses are black/white as you just feel sexy in anything black, or may be that's just me so I did not have a hard time choosing a proper attire for the said gathering. I just needed the time to shop and so, off to the mall I went.

While some of my colleagues spent a handful for hair and makeup, I had mine done by a good friend and for free because she's offered and she is really the nicest. I purchased a nude lippie (Shade: 656) and an eyeshadow both from Maybelline, though especially for this occasion because they are on sale at 200.00Php and 150.00Php respectively. What a bargain, right?

I also had a late-blooming acne-attack mid this year and I am still nursing it at the moment. I haven't really taken selfies for some months (not that I am fond of taking selfies, anyway) but here's a very rare (arting-arte) selfie for the occasion:

Can you believe it's already Christmas tomorrow? What a year it's been! 2016 has its fair share of ups and downs and one is just glad that we are near its closing. There are some things that felt big at a time but looking at it now, it is nothing more than that of a usual occurrence. Ever felt like that sometimes? When you think something is really huge at the moment and time has passed and it didn't feel like it anymore? That's not to say that you're invalidating the moment but big moments happened after big moments and you just do not know where to start so you just let it slip. And at that certain moment, you just lived in it. 

Cutting the chase, that's one of the reasons why I have not been as actively blogging as I have initially planned to. Life just sort of, happened.

Say for example I was very ecstatic with the Ginebra championship ending the eight year drought last September. I probably am still on a high that Jayjay Helterbrand has decided to give it another go and not retire yet but the conference has started and you just get on with it, like the "now" is more important among other things.

Also, I am back in Manila after six months. It's been fun, a bit problematic at times but a fun experience nonetheless. I've never been happier to be back home. It's made you even appreciate the things that you missed when you are out there experiencing life.

Sometimes things are okay until it isn't. You would think you are doing well until you aren't. Sometimes life completely blindsides you with certain things and you don't know what hits you until it did. But it should not be a reason for you to stop reaching for your goals. If anything, you should reconstruct and refocus on the things that will matter in the grand scheme of achieving them, all in its proper time.

A couple of months back I was able to attend to probably the biggest Catholic charismatic event of the year and in Singapore, no less: Kerygma Conference Asia. Every KCon is life-changing and I am just blessed that I was able to attend then. This is actually one of the discussions that we had during one of the talks. There is HOPE for the broken. And this is what HOPE stands for:

H

We are all broken even when we are too stubborn to admit it ourselves.



And what do they say when you're all the way at the bottom? There is no other way but up.

P

• By sticking together. One should not face the cruel world alone. 
• By praying and keeping Him close.
• By focusing on the positive side of things and working towards improving it.
• By being perceptive.
• By pursuing our hearts desire before it is too late.
• By being realistic without losing our ideals.

And lastly,

E

We only have to be ourselves, to move forward and celebrate what we have in the now.

x

"There will always be a blue sky waiting tomorrow.."  - Hale

I have actually been waiting for its release since it was announced that he is going to write an autobiography. I am stoked to know what he has to say, of how he is going to sort of explain himself from his actions for the past year but at the same time, I don't have much expectations because although he tends to get misunderstood in his interviews, he's always been this respectful and nice kind of guy so he would not say something deliberately awful towards someone, or at least I hope he would not. He's been the center of so much hate all throughout his career even during his childhood and pre-teens due to being "different". One of the reasons why he's resorted to this project is to have the stories come from himself instead of having it twisted by the media. This is all him: photos, personal views, anecdotes and preferences. Hence, the Zayn book.

Who can say no to that bloody face, though? Not me, apparently. I skimmed the book a bit after claiming off my copy from the local bookstore where I pre-ordered it because he has this look in him that you just want to sort off ogle and appreciate every single time. I am completely blown away by his effortless manliness and beauty; Something that I could not resist even when he is just that innocent boy who's just starting and learning from the biz. 

But he is so much more than that beautiful face.

***This is the part where I'd warn you that there may be some spoilers from the actual book so proceed at your own risk***

Let it also be known that Zayn's autobiography is not a tell-all as it was previously pegged. Some of its contents can also be read from his chapter off of their previous One Direction autobiography (Where We Are) and then there are parts that feels like an extended version of some of the interviews and magazines in which he has been featured recently. If anything, he's honest and that is what I like about it. Give it to this man who can blurt out a few words and unfortunately have his words be twisted into a dig to his former band mates. He gets hate even by mere existing coming from a multi-race, Muslim background, so what is new? He gets judged all the time. But that's how it is and I am glad that he's learned to filter, adapt and focus on what would matter the most and that is pursuing what felt real to him and his own music. I don't always agree with some of his decisions and actions but he has my full support.

The book is just one part of his life, hence, it has that unfinished feels into it and that is alright. There are plenty of years for him to live, to be polished like a diamond in the rough and there are so many new things to experience and to be in this journey with him, I am so up for it. 

I am glad he's focused on the process of creating music among any other things. It makes you feel like you are in this journey of self-actualisation with him during the creation of his successful solo record Mind of Mine released earlier this year.

I believe he is the most honest and vulnerable when he has started talking about his anxieties and how he is working for the better. Not all people can be brave enough to admit their weaknesses and share it for the world to revel in. In a business full of pretentious faces and people trying so hard to please other people, people who acting in a certain way because that is what is expected of them, he is of the rare breed. He is being true to himself.

I feel for all the pressure from the expectations that he's given to himself, to always be able to deliver and give his best for the people who matter the most (especially his dad of whom he look up to to a certain level). I love his feminist and nerdy side, vaguely speaking. It gave me of an idea of where he is coming from. It did not erase all the shitty decisions and the mess that he's previously been in but it has made me respect him all the more and understand him better. 

It made me even proud of who he has become and it's made me look forward to the future.

x

Gabby Alipe is back with his post-Urbandub solo offering EP called A New Strain and it is just fitting, a fresh new start to another era. I kind of expected (I did hope for it) him to release his solo stuff after the disbandment because with a talent like his, the world deserve to know his genius.

And he never disappoints. 

The first single is called Visions and it felt different and yet familiar.

The lyrics:

With every little let down

I won't breakdown

I would tell myself

Hoping I can get out

With every little let down

I won't breakdown

Sooner or later, hope to find

my way out

Certain things will come along

And weigh down

But I take them in stride

Move them one at a time

'Cause, I think I'm better than this

Working on making my visions

come to exist

All in good time I guess

I'm gonna have it all

All in good time I guess

Believing that everything's

All in good time

All in good time I guess

I've taken all the wrong turns

I took the long way

Was finding reasons

And they're keeping me down

Certain things have come along

And I've found

I can take them in stride

Move them one at a time

"I should've known"

"I could've tried it"

Won't let these words control me anymore

All in good time

All in good time I guess

All in good time

Believing that everything's

All in good time

***

I love how I felt connected with him through his music in a way and I am glad that he has not lost his magic with his lyricism. He still makes you think and ponder how the things around you work and it drives you to work on all those feelings that you bottled up. The positivism is being translated into the best way the he knows and that's through his music.

Sometimes we act on things on a whim and hope for the best outcome but things do not always end up the way we would have wanted it to and we found ourselves in the worst of the worst situations, the lowest of lows. And then there are visions: the realisation that the setup is temporary and the process may be longer than we are prepared for but it will be worth it as we work our way up in the end.

There's also this Tagalog song in the EP called Paalam and what a treat. It's probably the first time that he's sung a Tagalog song and it's all good.

A New Strain EP is available in all media form, also on the local record bar nearest you nationwide.

In the mood for stress eating after failing to score tickets for Coldplay (both in Manila and Singapore), I decided to go try Yo Panda Manila in Megamall after attending the mass near the area. I was just curious, mainly, because I have been seeing loads of Instagram posts of the egg waffles and ice cream combo goodness that this new food chain is to offer. As per usual I chose to order the matcha-flavoured one and well, might as well be in heaven, it is really good (or at least my satisfied palate would say so).

Matcha and ube are special flavours making them quite pricey than the other usual flavours but Yo Panda gives you your money's worth. I just love matcha, alright, hence the preferred flavour but there are just so many other flavours to chose from! It is even better if you have someone to share it with given the enormous size of the actual waffle/ice cream jelly treat. Not only do they serve these Instagram-worthy desserts, they also offer a vast number of options for rice meals and finger foods. 

Since I was starving but in a no-rice diet (only when I feel like it ha), I ordered a spicy fried chicken pao (aka a chicken sandwich but they used siopao bun instead of the regular burger bun and surprisingly it has worked. I loved how it has tasted overall.) with fries on the side along with my sumptuous dessert and I just feel so full for hours afterwards.

Further suggestions:

I think it is better to have a smaller portion option on the menu because like I said, the serving is pretty huge that I didn't get to eat it in its entirety (although maybe one of the factors is that the burger meal is heavy on its own). Also, maybe a faster preparation for the meals. The wait is all worth it, don't get me wrong but since we are talking about improving the experience here, might as well be on a roll, yes?

Definitely a must-try and would recommend 100% with friends.

x

Yo Panda Manila is located in SM Megamall 4th Floor Building A.

David has been performing this song since he came back from his Chilean mission on some of his tours in the US and even then, hearing it for the first time has already made its impact. The lyrics even made more sense when he's talked about it on his long banters. It's like he's baring it all. It has made me more excited for his new project if that is even possible. (The wait is killing us.) 

See a precious "Numb" on piano below (the official song is more pop/upbeat but this is just as beautiful):

While I am sort of hoping he'd release a song that we have not heard yet, I can't say I am disappointed with Numb. The new project is promising. I am overwhelmed as he is still this talented man that I know back in his American Idol days. He'll be giving these overrated pop stars these days (who has been blessed with the right biz connection and opportunities) a good run for their money. I feel like I may be possibly sugarcoating him too much but that's just how he is. I feel for the millennials who has not known his music because they are missing a lot. He is really dang good. 

Amazon: 

https://music.amazon.com/albums/B01M4NRM5N?ref=dm_sh_50fa-459f-dmcp-d0f6-cfe09

The first one is always going to be special, it seems.

I cannot help but feel extra nostalgic when our former lead engineer has shared the news that the Petronas Train 9 LNG Plant in Bintulu, Sarawak, Malaysia has already started production. I have been blessed enough to take part in the design and drawing preparations for the said project in the company where I previously worked.

Silly old me really have no idea where I would want my career path to lead back when I was still applying for that job. That was the time when I have so many doubts with myself and my self-esteem is really low. But with God's mysterious ways, I believe it is meant to happen, that I would get to work in this company and experience all kind of things. Technically, it wasn't my first job off of college (it is the second, actually) but it is the first in this field and it has opened all the doors and opportunities to learn and explore in the design field of civil engineering (because my previous job is in the construction/procurement). I am just grateful.

I still do not know where I want to be now, to be totally honest, which is why I admire those who did find their calling early on. I still cannot seem to know what my heart truly desires. (I just want to live, earn a bit, provide and learn from life, to put it briefly and vaguely.)

But going back, shifting from one field/industry to another made me realise where I really want to put my focus on, profession/career-wise: I want to learn more about steel structural design/ oil and gas industry and how these things work.

But the truth is, I have no idea what I was doing. Well, yes, I could recall a few engineering concepts here and there but I am "rusty" and a walking failure. There were days when you just want to give up because you cannot help but get frustrated when a supposed-to-be simple structure and procedures take you ages to actually finish. I kept making mistakes. I am pretty sure I'd let my team down and I am just a burden. I used to be the best in my glory days (in school when I was younger, but it can never really fully prepare you with what is out there, apparently), always giving my best but I cannot seem to accomplish things. I was internally pressuring myself to deliver. And that's when realised I was doomed.

I was lucky enough that God let me be surrounded with very understanding people and they never gave up on me and supported me in so many ways (whether they are aware or not). My professional family is very patient. My mentors has taught me a lot, guided me and I am pretty sure I will be keeping all the virtues that I learned from them until my last breath. Knowing that He still loves me despite all my shortcomings and struggles to get better has kept me going. 

And soon enough I learned to let go of the insecurities and accepted my faults and learned from my mistakes. I may still not be the best but I never gave up. I never waver. I just did what I can to contribute. I enjoyed every moment with the team and every working day is a learning experience, not only on the technical side but in life as a whole. 

Train 9 holds a special place in my heart and I am ever glad that I became a part of that team. Every overtime work that we have rendered seemed to be worth it, and it truly is, seeing the fruit of all (mostly theirs but semantics, eh?) of our hardwork now. The idea felt surreal (I am such a sap, but can you blaim me?) seeing your assigned area/item evolve (like a Pokémon. RIP English proficiency. I am lost for words.) from a Tekla Structures 3D model to a working STAAD file leading to a fully constructed structure and apparently has commenced with its production these days. It gave off a vibe of a proud mother seeing her baby for the first time, but ironically, the so-called baby is a mother of its kind (mother project) who's given birth to an individual whose vowed there and then to strive harder and never give up in life. Such a thing of beauty and balance. And it's for real.

The first one will always be special. It just is.

x

The article that my LE has shared can be accessed here. Cheers.

Ever had those moments when you have so many things in mind, big experiences / milestones in life that you want to share whether in person or in letters but life gets in the way and before you know it, the fad has come and go and it no longer feel "that" huge anymore so you end up bottling that certain memory forever? (Or at least until an inspiration strikes that you would get to write it down or someone would coax it out of you in a conversation.) Same goes with feeling an extreme emotion, whether it is positive or negative, so huge that it felt unexplainable at some point but when you started voicing it out it turned to be a small dot in the grand scheme of things and it doesn't feel like how it was before?

It certainly happens all the time. And so, given all the things that has happened in a span of a few months, despite having so many blog ideas, I have not really updated this online home in a while.

Maybe I did get to "live" a little. Maybe life gets in the way. But for whatever reasons, writing is still as therapeutic as ever so I won't halt. 

Life has been exciting, messy, fun and unpredictable. It's easy to get loss in the realm sometimes. It won't always be rainbows but it will never be all dark. With the strong spiritual foundation and the anchor that keeps on pulling me back, keeping me on track, I remain just as grateful. Maybe I'd get to elaborate one day and fill these virtual pages one special moment at a time (Ginebra winning the championship after eight long years, the foodie tab, the big shift, the travels, the homecoming, etc). Til then, thank you for being in this journey with me.

PS: For someone who finds it hard to make online account-related decisions, here's me going for another change. Ha. Say hello to aprilskelter! It's the same name that I use as my Instagram handle and I've recently just decided to use it as my blog URL as well.

x

Who would have thought that with just a forty minute ferry ride away from Singapore you can already experience a staycation of sorts (semantics!). Batam is the largest city in the Riau Islands Province of Indonesia, across Singapore and is the third-largest city in Sumatra region (Thank you, Wiki for that fact).

If you want to go for a quick massage (the specialty!), a shopping spree as the items are relatively cheaper than that in the city, and eat some seafood then you came at the right place. Staying over for a weekend, we were not really able to try the massage as we end up lounging on our hotel rooms instead, watching movies from the cable television (a.k.a. the definition of chill). 

We did a bit of a city tour, though, made possible by our lovely, accomodating tour guide. While Batam is not as aesthetically pleasing as its neighboring cities (there is not much to see, to be honest), it did give a sense of relaxation and contentment away from the hassles of the city life. Sometimes we just cannot help but long for the simplicity. It even made us miss staying in the province back home. It did not stop us from having fun, of course.

Here are some of our stops, as told in pictures:

SNACKING!!!

No pictures included in here but we bought J. Co Donuts, too! They are relatively cheaper in Indonesia (Well, this is where the cafe/donut chain has originated so...)

To end this little reminiscent trip, let me also share the Unusuals (and the Punny.)

Until our next escapade.

x

I cannot help but be bummed when the lineup of In The Mix in Manila was announced. I mean getting to see James Bay, Third Eye Blind, Panic! At The Disco and The 1975 all in one night??? That has got to be real awesome. So imagine my joy when I found out that Panic is going to have a solo show in Singapore. I decided I should not miss it even when it meant I will have to go alone. That being said, the very first splurge that I had since the move is probably a VIP ticket for the Singapore leg of Panic! At The Disco's summer tour.

I had it all planned since it was announced back in April. Inasmuch as it is fun to experience the music with my concert buddies back home, I had to go solo (for my very first non-Manila concert experience, that is) but it did not lessen all the hype and the fun. Luckily a friend flew all the way from Manila to catch the show and we did get to hang a bit while lining up at the venue.

The pre-show jitters and shenanigans...well, it is not as organised as I would have thought (knowing Singapore) but the excitement is very apparent with all the spectators in there.

AND THEN THE LIGHTS WENT OFF.
THE CROWD HAS TURNED UP THE CRAZY.
THE BAND TOOK THE HOUSE DOWN.
BRENDON URIE IS A LITERAL FIREBALL AND HE LIT UP THE STAGE.
ALL.
THE.
FREAKING.
WAY.
(Also took his shirt off in the process.)

I am not even surprised that the band is so great! I've seen enough videos on Youtube as proofs. If anything, I am very impressed and even more amazed and grateful to ever be present, watching them in the middle of the pit while rocking their hearts out.

Brendon Urie's vocal prowess is ever so impressive and the energy and the crowd is infectious and loud (though at the back of my biased mind I'd say Manila crowd is still the loudest crowd. ha.) What a wonderful experience, that is!

The old movie poster.

What I like the most about Twenty One Pilots is that their music makes you ponder about so many things. It's sincere and it makes you vulnerable to the "truths" whichever truth that you believe in, that is. It is powerful, highlighted by Tyler Joseph's soul-stirring voice and Joshua Dun's fervent drumming antics. (Also, because Tyler and Josh are #besfrengoals). 

It could be being on a clique and getting judged by the society.

It could be living the Christian life no matter how unconventional it may look to the public, and reflect His ways and His love through the life that you live instead of shoving up you beliefs up people's arses. (Everything you were taught can be put into a few words: Respect and obey God! This is what life is all about. (Ecc.12:13))

It could be standing up for what you believe in and a reminder that even when you feel like you know a person, you still do not know all the sides of a certain story.

It could be many things. Dope things.

***